I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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