WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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