A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize