and i looked up. we had an audience...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
