Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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