You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
