i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
