erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
