i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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