Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
