you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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