we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
