They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Randomize
