OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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