quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
