im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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