I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize