But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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