Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
