just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize