Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
