i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
