was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
