let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
