I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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