I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
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