did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
