I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
