You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize