Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
