did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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