dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
