Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
