You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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