o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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