Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
