Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
