Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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