let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
