i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
