come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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