I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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