I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
3 2 1 whiskey
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
