You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
