If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize