The maid of honor just puked.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
