lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
