is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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