cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
