he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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