Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
