this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
