Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You need Xanax blowdarts
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Randomize
